Sunday, 31 August 2008

what about,mums gout??? and wheres me profile gone?

what  with  my  own misery  just  lately, pain in  my  ankle  is  so much worse  i  now wear an ankle support, and  editors  choice,etc.i  forgot  to write about the person  this  journal  is  really  about,well  a  lot  of  it anyway.  my  mum.   it  wasn't until someone asked  me how she was  i realised  i hadn't updated  on her  gout  lately.  and  there  is a very  good  reason.   IT'S GONE.   ( hope this  desk is wood  because i am touching  it as i write  that.)    well,just  about  anyway.   ever  since  the last  time she went to the chiropodists  and  saw  that  male  chiropodists  her  feet  have  been  so much  easier.  the  uric acid  crystals  have all but disappeared,and  she  is  much happier  for  it.    If  only  the  arthritis  in her  knees   would  do the same.    she  really  is  suffering  with  them.    but  small mercies  anyway.      least  she  can  get about  a  little  bit  easier.  tracy  still comes,the  fact  she  only  comes  now  for  15  minutes  seems  to have  been  forgotten,as  tracy  gets  here  earlier  to compensate   lol.   she still  the  same  tracy.     no comment   lol.   mum  likes  her,and  they  get  on   well.   that  is  worth more  than  anything.  i am finding  driving  so painful  my  right ankle  gets  all  the  work  when i drive,but  this  support  does  help.       just  enough. and  of  course  i  rested  it all  yesterday.   coughs.      ermmmm   ok,  i  did  a  little  bit  of  gardening.    strimmed,cut  hedge,edged  grass            shuts  up.           look,it  needed  doing,and it was  a lovely  day.and  it  took  me  6  hours.   but  i  do  rest  every  few  minutes.  i  have  to.but  if  i give  up        at  least  trying        to  do things  normally,i  may as well give up altogether.        not likely anytime soon.        so   don't scold me lucy  lol

Now,some of you may have  noticed  that  our profiles don't seem  to be  on view at  the moment.     not  noticed??  try  it.   see  someone on your  buddy  list??   ok      lets  click  on  their  name,click  buddy  info  and  read  their  says  system error      please  try  later.    and  has  for  past  few days.      so?  well,i use chatrooms,and  its  nice  to see  who people are,   also  though  if  someone  leaves a comment  on your  journal,and  you don't  know them   its  good  if they  have a profile.  at  least  you know  if  they  male,female,etc.       my  profile  is  quite  long.   ( romantic    one  dear  lady  called  it,load  of  bull**** some  more  sensible  people   and  contains  a  lot  of  pictures.  over 100.       so  i went  to a lot of time and  trouble  to create  it.       and  no-one  can view  it.         why??        so  today  i went  on  aol noticeboards,they can be found  in the chat and community  section  on quick start.      sure enough  someone had  asked the same question i was going to.  why can't i view profiles???  the  answer  can  be  found  in  the following  link   AIM Profiles - Changes Are Coming to Your Profile Experience!    snappy  little  title.     basically,your  AIM  profile,which  was  AOL  member  profile,is  going  to  be replaced  by   Bebo  profiles.   Bebo  is a social  networking  site         now  owned  by  AOL.    i  shant  bother  writing  about  it,please  look  yourselves.          the  bit  i find  annoying  is,  if  we  want  to  keep our  profiles  we  must  move  them to  bebo.or  they  will vanish.  on  september  15th         now  i  have had  no  details  of  this.      no  emails  from  AOL.  nothing.  so,  i  have  signed  up  to  go  to  bebo as  they  ask,apparently  my profile  will now  be  uploaded automatically.     but  AOL   should at  least  tell us they are  doing  this        and  soon,surely?      in the  meantime    if  you  wish  to view a members  profile,in the long search box  along  the top of  your  screen  type       followed  by the  screenname          if  US   aol   it  is         hope  this  is  of  interest.    please  make  sure  your  profiles  arent  lost  to  the  ether.

september  tomorrow,soon  autumn will be  here,and  we have  had  such  a bad  summer.   let's hope  we get  a nice september  and  make  the most  of  it.    take care all

Saturday, 30 August 2008

next week is this week

well,after  all the rush getting things  sorted yesterday i thought i would  post  the entry  i ws going to write  next  week. clear??  good  lol        it  was   rather a surprise to find my entry  used  yesterday,and  caught me completely unawares.   just  want  to say  a couple  of  things about  it.  

to be asked if  i would like to be guest editor  was a great honour  to me, 10 months  journalling,part  timer  too  lol    it  was a  lovely surprise.     you  see,i have several different "lifes" on AOL,   jland  is  one  part,i  talk to my  friends  on IM every night,i  use  chatrooms         well 50s  romance  is  the  main one  i use,i  play  poker every  night,ive  just  joined  a league,nice  people   good,not  for  and   email         so  journals  tend  to get rather neglected.  and  i feel a bit guilty.  i have  over  50 on  my  favourite  sites   saved now,i tend to try  and  read  a  few every  night,i  get  alerts  for around  15  or so,and  those  i do  read  when they  are  posted,but  some  i  hardly  get  round to reading  for ages.      even  the  ones  i picked  i dont  always  read  when  they posted,  but  i  do try  and  keep  up.this  made  it  so hard  for  me  to  pick  my  favourite  ones.          and  if i am being  completely  honest,there  are others  i  may  have  picked as well.but  3  are  private,and  1  is  off aol  at  the  moment.           not  an easy  decision  to  make  by  the  way.           not  who  to  mention,that  bit  was  easy.          but  who  NOT  to  mention,that  was  the hard  bit. 

every  journal  is  different,we all have  our  story  to  tell,our  lives  to make public,our  thoughts  and  maybe  fears  to show.        and  when  i  read  your  journals,i  think     someone  went  to a lot of  effort  to write  this.  i know how  hard  it  is  sometimes  to  write something  someone  will  read           and  hopefully  enjoy,and  comment  on,and        come  back.   so  how  can  i  pick   6       7    whatever?? but  i had  to.   so        why  did  i pick  those  journals??  as  i said,  i  love  reading  those picked,and  in  one  or  two  cases  i think   should  be  read  by  more  people.         but  why  didnt  i pick  YOURS?         does  that  mean  i  dont  like  YOUR  journal??             NO.        if  i have  ever  commented  on  your  journal  it  means  i have  read   it,and  liked it  enough  to comment  on.           i  had  to make a choice.      personally  i think every journal  deserves to  be picked.         

i enjoy  wriying  this  lournal.          it  now  means  a  lot  to  me.         jland  means  a lot  to  me.          thanks  for  making  this  very  tired  carer        welcome.       every  commment  is   appreciated.                take  care all

Friday, 29 August 2008

guest editor me??? huh????

well         i am your guest editor of the week.    on  AOL Journals: Magic Smoke.   and  i have  written an entry  for same.         except.       i was told  it  was  NEXT  week  lol    so   as i only  just  read  my  mail,   and  as  i have  had  problems  with  pc       it caught  me unawares.       i had  the entry  written all ready for  next  week  and  posted on the guest  editors  staging journal,for some reason  it  was  used  today  instead  of next  week.        i  shall try and  let  all my  choices  kmow  as  soon as  i can,if  they  havent  read  magic smoke  already.          thankyou  for the honour                take  care all  mort        DONT  PANIC        LOL

Monday, 25 August 2008

disgrantled carer

you may remember i wrote a few weeks back i was applying  to get away for a few days sometime. i wrote a long letter  to  my  carers assessment social  worker (casw in future,its bit of mouthfull ) asking if it was possible to get any  help towards a break,financial  help that is.when i had my assessment  earlier in year,which  as  my early  entries  told i had  waited  for,for  4  months,the  casw promised  me several things.  mum  would get a voluntary visitor,    that  took  3  months.        yes C  comes  now,and i am grateful to her.             but  it took ages  to get  set  up.        i was promised  help to fill in forms,    i had  a letter  from the person concerned,he was busy  but would be in touch.  never  heard a word.   as  i  already  have said  i  had a spell of self denial  and  never did anything  about  it  until the other  week.       and  that  was   because of my  MS nurse  giving  me  different  organisation  to go to.       never  heard a word  from  other.        i was promised  help from carers  organisations,and  yes  i am now  registered, never  had  to use  them yet         but  they are there.         and      carers  grant.      casw told me  there is a grant carers can apply for every year,up to £200     for  help   with things  like  breaks,doing  hobbies  etc.       i  asked  for  help  towards a new  bed for  mum  as hers  was  broken,and  it was making my  job  hard  to make  it.        i  got £150           nowhere  near  enough  for a new  bed.   so  i  repaired  her  old one,and  we  bought  a  nice   thick  new  mattress  for her  with  the  money.     cost  £170              but  mum is  comfortable.         now  she        casw        told  me  this  grant  is paid  every  year ,  just  apply,say what  you  want  the money  for,runs  from april  to april.    so  thats what  i had asked  for  my  break.   carers  grant  to enable  me to get away  for  3  days.          hadnt  heard a word  until wednesday.

i had gone to doctors,got  home,mum said         social services  rang,  will ring you later  this  afternoon.        never  did.        next  morning  i went  up shop to get  papers,came  home        they  rang  again  said  mum               will ring  you  lunch time.        never  did. finally  she rang me friday.     a  new social worker  i have  never  met  before,  asked  me how  things  were,   and  when did i want  to  go away?  promising  i thought.      mid october  i  said.       ok  she  said,i can arrange  cover for your mum,extra carers  to get  her  food etc.          blah,blah.        no word about  money.       then  she said,oh  i am reading  your  letter,   you wish  to know  if there is any  financial  help.well  there  is  this charity  you could apply  to,i  will send  details,       ermmmm    just   sec.i  said          i  applied  for  carers grant,         oh  she  said,you have  to  get  in touch  with  work and  pensions          carers  allowance  is nothing  to do   with  norfolk county council      now.................   whoah,   i  cant  GET  carers  allowance,  the  benefit  i am on  i cant  get  it.        i applied   for  carers  GRANT.         i  explained  it all to  her.         and  she had never heard of  it.         said        maybe  it was a one off?   no        i was told  every  year.            maybe  it  was  a  social  grant,they  have to be  repaid  but....................NO,ITS A CARERS  GRANT.       long  and  short,  i  had  a  small bit  of  paper  come, with  this charitys address on  and phone  number   to  apply  to see if i can get any help from them,   she  will look into  carers  grant,but  couldnt  find  anything  on her  computer  about  it.         goodbye  mr  lake.       

i went  on the website  for carers.        and  i cant  find  anything  about  the grant  either.   still got  the slip  that came  with the cheque,and  sent  it  to the social  worker,but it does  look like        thanks  to cuts  in social security  funding,    carers  grant  has  gone.          along  with any  hope i had  of getting  away.        i havent  got  money to  waste  on taking a  holiday.    i only  applied  because  i thought  the  grant  was available.     working  on  what you  never  have  you  never miss,i  guess  i am not  really  too surprised.          but  i  am  just  one  carer.       there  are  thousands  in  the  country.           and  for  some,    that  grant,   to  be able  to  go away  for  a  little  break          is   a  lifeline.           i  shall apply  to  the charity,  but        i  am unpaid,  i  get  little  help,        surely  more  could  be   done  to  help  the  helpers?   we  save this  country  tens of thousands  of pounds,by providing  care  that  otherwise  would  have to  be funded for.             a  caring  society??         take care all.        many,many  thanks  for all the lovely  comments and emails  i got  over  the  MS  entry.    mort

Sunday, 17 August 2008

a grave mistake part 2 the MS bit lol

MS   2 simple initials,   stands for multiple  sclerosis       basically,wont  bore  you with details   it  means many lesions         or  scars.   it is a disease  of the central nervous  system where  the bodies own immune system turns on itself,stripping the myelin off  the nerves         (think of  myelin as the insulation,the nerves as the bare  cable  as in an iron or kettles  flex say. )  and  causing  "short circuits" in the body.  these  short circuits  are  the cause of  pain,loss of sensation,all sorts  of unpleasant  effects.   depending  on the number  of  lesions           and  where they are.   at  the last scan 2 years ago  i had  4 in my brain,5 on my spinal chord           something  like  that.   was  in   a  daze  when i was told.   doesn't  matter,  pretty  sure  theres  one or 2 more  now.

lets  just  clear up one or two misconceptions.   YOU DO NOT DIE FROM MS.  and  before  my  lovely  friend  lucy, day-to-day-life-by-Lucille4364 , starts screaming  at  me,let  me just explain.  her  beloved  and much missed  son  alan   died  tragically   in his early  40s     from  complications  caused  by  MS.       he  had a really aggressive  form           and  sadly   it  killed  him. please visit  her journal  and  read  her moving  tribute  to  him,and  how  it affected him.      makes  sad  reading.      and  lucy,   you have  been more of a help to me  than you will ever  know  in  my  coping  with  it.but noteveryone will go on to  get  that bad.

1 in 4 people end up in a wheelchair,or paralised in bed (like poor Emma,Wendys  21 year old daughter,bless her.i asked  jland to pray for her,as she had a bad  chest infection a while ago.she  got  over  it.  one  day  sadly  she  will not. )         but  that  means   3  in 4 people  will  not.  many  people  have  MS,and  never  even realise  it.its not found until after they  die and there is a post mortem.    several  different  types,if you really are interested   please visit  the MS societys  website          the  link is on my sidebar.   EVERY MS SUFFERER  IS DIFFERENT.     How i am now,doesn't  mean its  how i will be  next  year,or  even  next  week.  i  could  go  downhill very  quickly,or,like  my next door neighbour,remain  pretty  mobile  for many  years.   WE ALL SUFFER IN DIFFERENT WAYS.   now,  i am a very  private  person,so  some things  i have'nt  told before,except  in  my  "black"journal.       the  private  one  i keep to  scream in .   its  not for public viewing.   not  even  in  my  name.       now  i am going  to  tell it  all.   

MY SYMPTOMS.    vary  from  week to week,these  are  what  i  have  had/have now/never bloody  want again.    

loss of feeling  in my  hands and  fingers,at  first it was  just  the right   now  its  both.   think  pins and  needles,  or  better        imagine plunging  your  hands  into stinging nettles           that  burning sensation??   i have  that  all the time.

spasticity.    it  means   a  jerking, uncontrolled  spasmodic  "twitch"    i  get  it in  legs,and  left  shoulder.  i  have woken  nearly  screaming  in agony.           Pain in  my  legs,  a dull "ache"   that  wont  go away.           my  right  ankle  is  bad.  very      also  the  left  but  not  so bad.  MS  causes  ankles  to  swell              a  lot of  my pain  is  also due to arthritis  in them as well.   balance  problems,  i  do come  over  dizzy  often and have  had  3  falls.   im sure  i told  you lucy.   lol   sorry   but   some things  were  too painful.

optical  neuritis.      please god never again.    a  sharp  stabbing  pain  from  "behind" the eyeball.    thankfully  it  cleared  up  fast.            "the  fuzzies"     my term for it.  actually  it  was  a friends  in  chatrooms  term  for  it     she  has it as well.         i  nicked it  sylv  lol.          i sit here  sometimes,and i cant  think.   i  cant type  as  i cant seem  to  know  where  the letters  are,       usually  if  im tired.        it  passes but  its  scary. wonder  why  i dont  post  as  often as i used  to??    these  new  tablets  do help  though.

incontinence.         hide  that  one  up,no-one  may notice,        it  has  happened  3  times,with MS  you  can lose  control of  your  bladder         that  spray  i used  last  week  will stop  that          bit  too well  lol     its   very  embarassing.         also  you  really  cant   just  wait  to  go to the toilet,if you want  to  go   you  GOT  to go,no choice.

impotence.      well,  lets just say       "  fings aint  what  they  used to  be "     and  leave it at  that.   and  yes         viagra  will help.     

swallowing  problems.   sometimes  food,tablets   etc.get stuck,the nerves  in my throat  that control  the muscles   dont  always  work properly.          speech problems.   not  bad but i do slur  my words  if  i talk a lot   or i am tired.      depression.       ya think?  lol   

so         sounds  horrendous doesnt  it??  there  i  lay,  twitching,screaming,peeing,      except  i  am here  typing  this journal.  yes  my  ankle  hurts,yes  my  legs  ache,yes  my hands  are  numb               and  me  bloody  back is  killing  me.            but  i can   walk,ok  i do use a walking  stick.   (jaynee  hun  if  you  reading  this,can i have  ya pink one??? lol)        i  can  care  for  my  mum  still,ok   sometimes  the  house  doesnt  always  get hoovered/dusted   etc.  but  who  cares?  its  reasonably  clean.  i  stillcook,just  being  very  careful  how  i  hold  hot  tins.        i  still can drive,  if  i feel  very bad,we  don't  go out in car.       common sense.      i  still do my garden.      ON MY GOOD DAYS.         and  thats  the  thing.       there  are  days  i  really  cant  do  anything  except  feel sorry for myself.          so  now,i dont.   mum understands now  better,  and  we  get along  from  day  to  day           we  help each  other.

so,  anyone  who  has  got  MS,or just  diagnosed  with  it,please      don't  despair.   hopefully   you  will have a long  and  useful  life.   just  take things easy,   and  don't  do what  i did for  these   past  7  months or so.    pretend  its not  there            it  is.   but  it can  be  tamed.           at  least         i am going  to have a damn good try.    take care  all           and  thanks  for all the comments  on my editors  choice entry.   even if  2  new  readers  did assume  i was  female.       lol          you  all help,more than you can realise               mort  

a grave mistake part one

amazonian rain forest maybe???

whats that lurking  behind all those weeds???

this is how i found  my dads  and  granddads  graves  yesterday.  Hindolvestone church yard and  the graves have  featured  before in my journal,   but this time  i was horrified.  i honestly had no idea where my grandparents graves  were at first.  dads was  bad enough.  now,ok  it is my fault you can say,i haven't been to do them in ages,mainly  because i  have to load  the mower into car,drive 17 miles  unload,cut graves       repeat. and  i  really havent felt well enough to do them.  i didn't yesterday,my ankle is killing  me,but  i loaded car,had got  some nice flowers  i had bought,  and  went  to hindol to do them.  i was there  nearly  2 bloody hours.   absolutely exhausted,and  seething.  i keep cutting 4 more graves  besides   my families,1 of which is next  to dads,  the family  of that  persons  grave know i am ill.    and  would have  seen the state  of my dads  grave,       so,dont  you think  that  just  maybe,they could have  cut  it for me when they cut  theres  last  week or whenever??  that  was  all neatly  cut.      oh  no.   so,i am afraid  i  didnt  cut the other ones i normally  do.   i  was  too tired.     maybe  its  me,but  i  was  rather  annoyed.

anyway,got home,had  quick  sandwich,and  straight  out  into  garden.       yes,full moon this  week,lol.   i  had  to take down baskets  and  bags.  they have flowered themselves  out.  i  still have  3  baskets and 4 wall baskets  with  just  the fuschias left in them.  all the busy lizzies and petunias  were removed.  and  they still look good. sometime i will post a pic.    i also,   as  i  was  doing  it,cleaned the boarder  up,removed all the dead bedding,and  planted  4  geraniums  i had  in pots.   looks  clean and  tidy.  should  do,i  took 5  barrowloads of rubbish  off.      collapsed  in chair  after  i can tell you.

today,  i  leapt  out  of bed  with  a song  in  my.......................ok   i  cant  move  lol.   who said  serves  you right  mort??    you  quite right  it does.    my  ankle  is  trying  to  turn into a football,my  legs  ache,i didnt  sleep  too good,as i was in  pain.    so  why did i do it???   bear  in mind  i  did  cook a full roast  lunch  today,but  thats  all i have  done,i went to bed after  lunch.    slept  nearly 3 hours.   so   why??   why  do it all at  once??

the trouble  with  MS,is  its such a deceptive  disease.  when  in remittance,and  i am feeling  reasonably ok  i  can  get  on and  do  stuff,  bearing  in mind  i have  3  crushed  discs  in my lower  back,  and  had  a discectomy  15  years  ago,  so  pain  is  something  i live  with  every  day.      but.       and  this  is  where  i  went  wrong  back in january,  i  thought  MS  was  just  another  ache,another pain,one i can ignore,like  i can  mostly  with my  back.   take  things  easy,i will be ok.   no  worries .   what  i hadnt  realised        not  until a few  weeks ago  is,MS  moves  the goal posts.  just  as you think         i  can  cope  with  this,it  changes.hits  you with something  else.

I really havent  said  too much  before now  about  how  it affects  me.   oh,you know  i  have  pain,swallowing  troubles    bad  ankle.         well,i  had  called  this journal  "caring and sharing"         because  its  what  i do,  i  care  for  mum  24/7/365.   it  was  supposed  to be about my  life  caring  for  her,  and  i  thought         well,its  turning  into  "mortys  got   MS"   so  i deliberately  have  tried  to  keep  a  lot  back.   i  had  a  good  moan  in an earlier   posting.   i  didnt  want  to  come  over  as  being  "brave"  in  caring  for  mum  whilst  having   MS.    then  a  comment  from  guido  made  me  stop and  think,maybe  i should    speak  more  of  the  MS,     because  maybe,out  there  in  jland    there  is someone  reading  this,who has  just  been diagnosed,or  who  has  MS  and  isnt  coping  well.        so,  bear  with  me  for  a  while. lets  just  explain  what   this  vile  disease  is,how  it  affects  me,and  where  i am going  from here.  i shall post  this  now,part 2  will follow shortly.   please  bear  with  me. take care all

Friday, 15 August 2008

thankyou jeanette

jeanette of  Jeannette's Jottings is the  guest editor  on  AOL Journals: Magic Smoke this  week.  and  as one of her  choices      she  picked  my  journal.         i  am  one of the guest editors picks.         how lovely is that?    I want to say  thanks  to  jeanette,   no idea  why  she  picked this  load  of  ( sometimes ) self pitying  whinging       but  she  did.  and  i am grateful  to  her.   if  you are  a new reader   you  are  welcome,please  leave  a  comment,  and  cheque  under  mat.   thanks.  lol. 

i have been writing this journal since last october,it was origionally  intended  as a means to let off  steam,i  was waiting to have a carers assessment  done,  that  took ages  i  recall.       it  seems to have  changed  its direction  since  i was confirmed  with MS,just  lately  i have  been  self pitying,  and  instead  of  mother  and  my  caring  for  her  its  changed  to  me,and   how  the  MS  is  affecting me.           but     i  am still caring.     today  we  went to fakenham  and  just  did  the weeks shopping,the lady  from disability rights  rang me yesterday afternoon,and asked if i minded  if she came  then  instead  of today,   just  caught me  as i was then going  to cut  the graves.    good  job  she  did  come  then,that  form  took  2  hours  to  fill in.          as  she  said,i  would never  have done  it  if  it was left  to me.         now  i  wait  and  see  their  verdict.     she  did  say   i  should  be entitled  to  extra  benefits,also  said  couldnt  believe  i  had  never  applied  for it  before.        my  back  trouble  alone  was  enough  in  her opinion   for  me  to get  it.           we  will  see,  lol.         also,  today  i  have  really  bit  the  bullet.   and  rang  for  an application  form  for  a blue  badge           disabled           nasty  word.      it  means         that  you  cant  do  things  that  able  bodied  people  can.       and  i  realise,   that  that  is  how  i  am  now.          never  mind.   many  thanks  once  again  to  jeanette           thanks  to  you  all,who  read  this  and  have  left  me  lovely  comment,          take care  all               

Friday, 8 August 2008

few pics of garden

just  a few pics,been really pleased  how  garden has  looked this  year,going over a bit  now,  but  still looks lovely.

    this begonia  is 4 years old,this and a yellow one  is  all thats left of a pack of 32 i bought 4 years ago as plug plants.   keep them dry  through  the winter  and start them off in the spring.

  yes lucy,they  do look nice  lol.   actually  the smaller ones  do taste  a bit  better.      a  bit.

 stiffkey  salt marshes    the sea  is  about a mile over  them,when the  tides  out  you can walk out on the sands  for miles.       best you  dont get  caught on them when the tide  comes  in though. 

i have got a lady  from disability rights coming to see me next  friday,  apparently  i  should  be claiming  other  benefits         and  i havent.  hope  everyone  is having a lovely summer  whatever  the  weather          take care all

yep,that WAS summer.

so much for summer heat,as i write this  its  frankly  peeing it down,gale force  winds blowing,and  it looks like  bloody november.   ah,british summer time at its  best. although it should  get out later  the  forecast for the next few days is ermmmmm    rain.  which is a shame.Wells next  sea  has their carnival day tomorrow,a lot of  hard work goes into it,and  its sad  if its  ruined  by bad weather.  still,there are a lot  of holidaymakers about,albeit  looking rather fed up and bedraggled. here in Stiffkey  we have a camp site  down near the marshes,on what was an old army training camp during  World war 2,frankly  i would  rather  keep at home lol,but  it  was  full last  saturday evening  when i took a walk.   pity them today  though.i think i would  go home if it was me.

I saw Dr.M last  thursday, he looked at lindas reccomendations  but  has advised  that  one of the 2 she wanted  me to try,another pain killer,  has side  effects which he thinks will make me feel very ill,and as at the moment  i seem to be doing ok on the ones i am on,we decided  to give it a miss.   the  other,i have been trying.     it's a nasal spray  to inhibit the  need  to go to the loo in the night,MS sufferers tend  to have trouble  "holding on",or to put it another  way,if  ya gotta  go,omg  too late  lol.      a couple of times  i have had  to  get up  in the night,quick,and  then  the  pain  in  my ankle and legs  stop me going back to sleep,so  linda thought  it  may help.not  too keen on reading  the leaflet,but i thought  heyho,2 squirts,1 up each  nostril, off  to bed        out like a light      next  morning,i was up at my usual time    5.45    omg,but  tracey comes at 7  and i do like an hour  of peace and quiet  on my own first,  into  bathroom,and          oooo     dont  want  loo.  in  fact        no  sign.    which  is  strange.         and         why  are  my  ankles  so  swollen,pain  in the  right  one  much  worse.       cut  long  story  short,i  ended  up taking  one of  mums  water  tablets,  i  rang  Dr.M   at  11    and  said,i  cant  wee,lol           ah,he  said        think   1  squirt  in  future  will be  ample  for  you,best nick  one  of  mums  diuretics.      so,spray  is  sitting  in its  box           and  its  keeping  there.     i was in 

yesterday  i went  to Kelling hospital,linda  asked  the speech therapist  to see me,  and  i was with her  for  45 minutes.  she  had a long  talk,and  explained  that  the left side of  my mouth is  slightly  weak,i have a slight  tremor in my  lips,and  my  tongue  is  not  quite  so  mobile  as it should be.   explains  why  i slightly  slur  my  words   specially  when tired;        or  yack a lot.      also,i  swallow a sip of water  twice,as  my  swallowing  reflex  is  weak,which  is why i sometimes get  problems  swallowing,and  explained  i  do have to be careful  with  certain  things  i   eat. all in al,she  is quite  pleased to tell  me  i dont  have  too much trouble  at the moment,and is  ringing  me in october  to see how  i am.   i notice  i slur  my  speech,but others  often dont,unless i am feeling   tired. like  now.        been  doing  bit  to much  i  think.  baked  this week,cleaned,cut  grass,blah  blah.        taking  it  easy  today,just  going  shopping  to fakenham  in a short  while  and  thats  it.

lastly  heres  a  few  pics, the  hanging  baskets  and  pots  still look lovely,and  i have  been  really pleased  how they  have  done.

i am going to add some  more  in another  entry,  just  in case  i lose  this entry  i am  closing  it.  take  care  all.