Friday 29 January 2010

what a MeSs

i went to cromer hospital to see dr.C.the MS consultant.running dead ontime too i may add,awful wet and dreary day.lucky to get a space just outside main building.i went in and found linda my MS nurse.dr.C asked how i felt i was from last year,and told him around 25% worse.my swallowing now can be very awkward,etc.now linda had already told me he is the kind of dr.you either love or hate.direct is being polite.he looked at me and said,well morton,i am afraid your MS is going as i expect it too,as the nerve sheath is worn away,you will experience more problems,however because of your age i don't expect it to turn primary. like i was too old to have MS according to last neurologist??poor linda was making OMG faces at me as he was speaking lol.anyway,we shook hands as i left,i shall see him a year from now,i am increasing baclofen to another 1 a day,make appointment to see speech therapist about swallowing,etc.linda walked out with me and whispered i told you so,lol.are you ok mort?yeah,actually i am.i am not completley daft,i know well enough what can and may happen.one day at a time.i arent at that stage yet.
monday i had to be in norwich at hospital by 10.30,and was there at 10.plenty of time.........except.I WAS AT THE WRONG DAMN HOSPITAL i assumed it was my normal hospital.i was at the norfolk and norwich.actually i should have been at what was the old west norwich,now norwich community hospital.it didnt help the first idiot i asked where pain management was,sent me right round side to oncology.luckily i showed the nice receptionist the letter.so i had to ring them,lie through my teeth i waqs stuck in traffic and made my back to where i should be.half hour late.dr.was ok about it,he had seen another patient in front of me,he showed me the scan on my back,and discussed what we could do about it.basically...............until i am finished with the blood thinning tablets i am on for heart in november not a lot.putting me back on gabapentin,a drug i first was on to help with pain before the MS was diagnosed.it may help to dull the nerve pains i am getting from the prolapsed disc.later i may need injections into spine but frankly he thinks i am unlikely to be allowed surgery because of heart.what a day monday was.i didnt get home til gone 1,mum is still in bed.i rang dr.again tuesday as the pain was so bad,he came out and gave her colchicise tablets,a powerful remedy for pain relief of gout,quite dangerous and she only has 12.did seem to help.but last night things took a turn for the worse,as she got out of bed to use commode last thing,her bunion,which she has had for years,and which had swelled even larger due to the gout.........split wide open.blood everywhere,on carpet,sheets,poor mum.luckily i had a dressing from last time she had trouble,and quickly applied it,wrapped it well,and the bleeding stopped. rang surgery,and district nurse came out this afternoon,washed and re did it for mum.funnily enough she said as it burst the pain has eased a lot.still very bad,but i think she had an infection in that toe.please god she is on the mend.
now,back to social services. a very nice lady came to see me yesterday.(MPs office has beeen in touch by the way,i am writing a full report and mailing it to them next week.) she told me because i had rung again saying it was urgent i had gone from pending to the top of a very long list.anyway,we discussed mum,me,my MS,heart.she was astounded and very annoyed i had had my half hour morning call reduced to 15 minutes,agreed mum needed a further call in the evening,and is going to see what she can do. there is a provision now for direct payments,so i can hire a dedicated carer/carers to help.something to think about, a very useful meeting.
now due to various reasons,i am going to write more about this,and mums care,in the future.but in another blog. a private one,please mail me at mortonlake@aol.com giving your email addresses if you wish to be a reader. the reason for this will be revealed on that blog.wont happen for day or 2. think of it as the black journal you can read,lol.
thanks for all the get well wishes to mum,and for me. take care all. as i write this it has been snowing again,wind frost,bitterly cold. roll on spring.

Thursday 21 January 2010

coincidence or not.

If i was of a nasty suspicious nature,which of course i am not,much,i would be rather cynical about the phone call i had this afternoon at 3.45. hello,mr.lake? this is V from social services,i understand you enquired about having a carers asseessment? i did yes, well,i am not the carers assessor,i do all the assessments for care needs.but i will be happy to come and see you next week,thursday at 10.30 be ok??oh yes;lol. now,i have had no word from MPs office,they did say they were so short staffed due to illness,but its rather a co-incidence that after i had rung MP social suddenly found this assessor. must have been just lying around the office doing nothing.lol.anyway,she is coming to see me,so hopefully i can get a care plan sorted for mum if i do need to be in hospital or away for any length of time.taken 4 months,4 phone calls,2 letters so far.we will see.
Mum continues to have the most awful pain in her feet due to the gout,and has been in bed all day again today.most unlike her.i have to go to cromer hospital tomorrow afternoon to see dr.C my MS consultant,i hope she will be ok on her own until i get home.think i can get brrian to call in.hope so. on monday i have to be at norwich by 9.30 for pain management clinic for back,tracey is going to come back mid morning,i shouldnt be too late.hope the tablets will have helped ease her pain by then.
I am tired,i ache,and my MS has gone ballistic.interesting little side effects,poor balance i notice,hands dead,blurry vision.always the same when i am tired and worried.and angina not helping.but we carry on.take care all.mort and thanks for all the kind comments and advice.

Wednesday 20 January 2010

return of the gout

for a change no trying to be witty for a heading.mainly because i havent had a lot to smile about lately.after going down with the bug i felt awful,but it didnt last long thank goodness.next day i was feeling better.i have heard from hospital,and go in feb.2nd.same time.
on friday i was going to take mum to fakenham shopping,but just as she was getting ready she came over dizzy,and felt ill.making sure she had everything she needed to hand i nipped off and did the shop alone.she seemed ok.saturday she was fine,sunday i cooked a lovely roast chicken,mum went to bed,and all was well.until...............2.00am i heard her crying.she had come up in huge hives,blisters almost.rubbed some E45 on and she tryed to sleep.bad night for both of us.i was worried when i saw her feet the next morning.the gout had returned with a vengeance.and her poor hands,the fingers looked like sausages,so swollen were they.i decided to ring the doctors,and explained what was wrong,dr.M soon came out.he thought she had had an allergic reaction to something she had eaten,and it had also seemed to trigger the gout. he decided she should go on a tablet for the gout,and i went and got these for her at 4.
that was monday.its now wednesday and she has been in bed all the while,her feet are so painful she cant walk even a step.thank goodness for the commode.i just get it as close to bed as it will go.at least the itching has stopped,and i think the swelling in joints slowly going down.i hope so,as it is awful to see her in so much pain.
now back in september i asked for a carers assessment,i really do need more help looking after mum now,i am not well,there is a good chance i will have to go in to hospital,maybe for some time,so asked for assessment so a care plan ccould be put in place. september 18th. i had the forms i sent returned,with a note that the assessment officer would be in touch. not a word have i heard,so on the 9th december i rang.asked to speak to the man who had signed the letter in september,only to be told they had never heard of him.!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it transpired he had moved to fakenham office,but it does say much about adult social services in norfolk.anyway,i rang the number they gave me,spoke to him,explained i was not well,heart and MS etc.he promised the officer would ring me "in a day or 2".again,not a word,so today i rung,yet again.oh,he said,there is only one assessment officer at the moment and hse is so busy,i will tell her you rang and.............whoaaaa sonny.i calmly explained there was every chance i may need surgery soon,and a care plan MUST be in place as soon as possible.he said,well i will tell her it is an emergency,she will ring you later. did she??no.so,i have rung my local MPs office,thats member of parliament for my american friends,and his secretary will be in touch in day or so.and the lady i spoke to was horrified.as it is a general election year,somehow i think my MP will gleefully take on my case.and my local paper has been doing a series called "WE CARE" about carers day to day lives. i think,social services does NOT care may make them a good story.
it is time i got nasty.i am worn out,i feel ill,the MS has been so bad all winter,my hands are completely dead,i have fell down 3 times,and with all the worry about heart and back i have had enough.i need help,and i am not getting it.i can no longer rely on neighbours to help me when i am in hospital,tracey only comes back 1 morning a week,so on the tuesday i go in she will come and make mum a cup of tea,i am going to ask carol to swap days if she can so she will be with mum in the afternoon,but a plan needs to be in place if i do go in for longer.we will see what happens.i shall keep you informed.take care all,keep warm and well.

Thursday 14 January 2010

thhink this says it all.thanks to christine for sending me it

Dear Lord, Every single evening As I'm lying here in bed, This tiny little Prayer Keeps running through my head:
God bless all my family Wherever they may be, Keep them warm And safe from harm For they're so close to me.

And God, there is one more thing I wish that you could do; Hope you don't mind me asking, Please bless my computer too.
Now I know that it's unusual To Bless a motherboard, But listen just a second While I explain it to you, Lord..

You see, that little metal box Holds more than odds and ends; Inside those small compartments Rest so many of my friends.
I know so much about them By the kindness that they give, And this little scrap of metal Takes me in to where they live.

By faith is how I know them Much the same as you.
We share in what life brings us And from that our friendships grew.

Please take an extra minute From your duties up above,
To bless those in my address book That's filled with so much love.

Wherever else this prayer may reach To each and every friend,
Bless each e-mail inbox And each person who hits 'send'

. When you update your Heavenly list On your own Great CD-ROM,
Bless everyone who says this prayer Sent up to GOD.Com Amen



GOD BLESS ALL MY ONLINE FRIENDS.thanks for all your kindness and comments,tc all.

Tuesday 12 January 2010

HOME SICK

i cant win. i got up this morning at 5,made a cuppa,sat here and read mails,sorted everything out,made some toast,felt bit queasy,worry about hospital ?hmmm,took mum tablets, all ok,apart from feeling a bit ill.tracey came and went,mum having breakfast,and it hit. oh dear god. i shall spare you the details. explosive diarrhoea. i had a shower,had to go to shop to get mums pension,and as i stood in there,with a scarf over face,just in case it was something nasty and not just a one off,i knew i was soon going to be sick,just made it home.violently sick.and well,going to draw a veil over the rest.suffice it to say i have this damn novovirus going around,my hospital has actually cancellled all visitors,so when i rang admissions,yet again having to cancel for the second time,the cardiac nurse i spoke to said,i had it last year,awful,thanks for keeping away.it will be rescheduled as soon as possible.rang pam,sent txt to tracey who was coming back mid morning,and will cancel the rest of week later,rang carol,mum rang chris,painted UNCLEAN KEEP OUT on front door,ok last bit not true,lol. i can honestly say ive never been so ill in all my life.where i caught it i have no idea.but its made me feel awful,and.........just been ill writing this.oh well,better luck next time. take care all,thanks for your lovely messages,i shall keep them for when i do go.lol. keep warm,safe and well,mort.

Monday 11 January 2010

hospital time

i go into hospital tomorrow,tuesday,got to be in by 11,30,pam picking me up at 10.over an hours drive.i am having another angiogram.this was scheduled,but at the assessment 3 weeks ago i told the cardiac nurse ive had pains in my left arm, i had changed the beds that monday.and i had felt ILL. i was so close to dialling 999 and calling for ambulance. when she heard this she had an ECG and blood tests done immediately.ECG was similar to the last,just a slight blip on the chart,which may mean i had a very slight heart attack.or the stent may have moved.i should have gone in last week,but weather has been so awful,and pam had such a bad cold i darent risk it.i have a 35 mile drive,at least 15 of which are on untreated roads. and we had to be there at 7.30.so instead i go in tomorrow,but i am having to keep in overnight.i think dr will put another stent in if needed.there and then. however if damage has been done,or arteries are worse it will mean major bypass surgery at papworth hospital. mum will have company most of tomorrow,tracey coming back,carol in afternoon,chris in mporning,brian night.ive made a shepherds pie for there tea,so she should be ok.hope to be home wednesday sometime.thanks to guido for putting it on call for support. Jland still lives.thanks for all the messages on facebook.i will let you know how it goes.lucy,stop worrying,dont nag,im ok.lol. take care all.

Sunday 3 January 2010

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MUM

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUM.89 TODAY. BORN 3 JAN.1921. AND HAS BEEN THE BEST IN THE WORLD TO ME. and now i care for her. what goes around,comes around. its a pleasure and an honour to care for her.just wish i could take away the pain and confusion she suffers.but thats beyond all the love in the world. take care all,mort xxxx