hearts and flowers

i have been feeling really ill ever since Christmas day.rushing around getting lunch,stressing,lol brought on a massive angina attack.my own stupid fault,but it made me really feel bad.pain in arm,tight feeling in chest,bad signs.so last week i went off to dr.M.he examined me,said heart sounded ok,was still beating at any rate,lol.but,i had a very nasty chest infection.did think i had,i could feel it.so put me on antibiotics,my favourite big yellow horse pills that always get stuck and taste vile.also,increased the beta blockers i am on to double strength,and i do feel much better.one worry less.the MS is bad at moment,loss of feeling in my hands leads to smashed crockery quite often,dropped a nice vase last week full of flowers mum had had for birthday.i am getting terrible nightmares as well,but i think they are the result of increased beta blockers.alll in all not the start i hoped for in 2012.

mums bunion is causing concern again,very badly swollen,and that split is very red.or its scar is.nurse will look at it if it gets worse,really do not want it to burst.nasty for her last time,took months to heal.

the group i started on facebook continues to grow,if anyone is interested in joining,please contact me or indeed Guido,he is an admin for me.anyone in pain with MS,FM,ME,Arthritis,diabetes,anything that causes pain and distress.we share what we are feeling,and we help each other.we care,we share. hmmmm wonder where i got that from? lol.why did i start it?mainly because 1 member had MS,and was worried.there are so many places you can get "help and advice" from,MS society being the best,but what about FM?yes,there is a web site,as there are for many if not all of the different illnesses,BUT they are all so impersonal.what as needed,i thought anway,was a place we could go to be with friends.where people could come together to give each other help and support.to share information,new advances,or,just to have somewhere private,where friends and family couldnt read,to unload what is worrying us.it is a private group,only members can read what we write.many members, and i have over 40 now have never written anything,or shared. but,and i have had messages and emails thanking me,still get comfort from reading what others have posted,and realising they are not alone with their fears. fear.it is a nasty thing to realise you have a disease,whatever it may be,that is affecting your life.making you "not the person you were".and it is nice to get support,and we are friends on there first and foremost.

anyway,hope you all had nice christmasses,and new year celebrations.it has been a mild winter here this year,no snow,at least where i am,indeed very,very few frosts.i found a clematis flower on the large one i have near my front door,and bulbs are poking through.i know we can still get a bad time,but it all helps.roll on the spring. the primrose in the picture is growing in a tub,lovely to have some colour in the garden.cyclamen are all blooming as well.pansies are poor though,slugs and snails had a good go before the winter.never really recovered.

i go and see my MS consultant next month,apart from that i hope to be free from hospital visits for a long time.i do hope you are all keeping as well as can be,take care all,mort xx