MS 2 simple initials, stands for multiple sclerosis basically,wont bore you with details it means many lesions or scars. it is a disease of the central nervous system where the bodies own immune system turns on itself,stripping the myelin off the nerves (think of myelin as the insulation,the nerves as the bare cable as in an iron or kettles flex say. ) and causing "short circuits" in the body. these short circuits are the cause of pain,loss of sensation,all sorts of unpleasant effects. depending on the number of lesions and where they are. at the last scan 2 years ago i had 4 in my brain,5 on my spinal chord something like that. was in a daze when i was told. doesn't matter, pretty sure theres one or 2 more now.
lets just clear up one or two misconceptions. YOU DO NOT DIE FROM MS. and before my lovely friend lucy, day-to-day-life-by-Lucille4364 , starts screaming at me,let me just explain. her beloved and much missed son alan died tragically in his early 40s from complications caused by MS. he had a really aggressive form and sadly it killed him. please visit her journal and read her moving tribute to him,and how it affected him. makes sad reading. and lucy, you have been more of a help to me than you will ever know in my coping with it.but noteveryone will go on to get that bad.
1 in 4 people end up in a wheelchair,or paralised in bed (like poor Emma,Wendys 21 year old daughter,bless her.i asked jland to pray for her,as she had a bad chest infection a while ago.she got over it. one day sadly she will not. ) but that means 3 in 4 people will not. many people have MS,and never even realise it.its not found until after they die and there is a post mortem. several different types,if you really are interested please visit the MS societys website the link is on my sidebar. EVERY MS SUFFERER IS DIFFERENT. How i am now,doesn't mean its how i will be next year,or even next week. i could go downhill very quickly,or,like my next door neighbour,remain pretty mobile for many years. WE ALL SUFFER IN DIFFERENT WAYS. now, i am a very private person,so some things i have'nt told before,except in my "black"journal. the private one i keep to scream in . its not for public viewing. not even in my name. now i am going to tell it all.
MY SYMPTOMS. vary from week to week,these are what i have had/have now/never bloody want again.
loss of feeling in my hands and fingers,at first it was just the right now its both. think pins and needles, or better imagine plunging your hands into stinging nettles that burning sensation?? i have that all the time.
spasticity. it means a jerking, uncontrolled spasmodic "twitch" i get it in legs,and left shoulder. i have woken nearly screaming in agony. Pain in my legs, a dull "ache" that wont go away. my right ankle is bad. very also the left but not so bad. MS causes ankles to swell a lot of my pain is also due to arthritis in them as well. balance problems, i do come over dizzy often and have had 3 falls. im sure i told you lucy. lol sorry but some things were too painful.
optical neuritis. please god never again. a sharp stabbing pain from "behind" the eyeball. thankfully it cleared up fast. "the fuzzies" my term for it. actually it was a friends in chatrooms term for it she has it as well. i nicked it sylv lol. i sit here sometimes,and i cant think. i cant type as i cant seem to know where the letters are, usually if im tired. it passes but its scary. wonder why i dont post as often as i used to?? these new tablets do help though.
incontinence. hide that one up,no-one may notice, it has happened 3 times,with MS you can lose control of your bladder that spray i used last week will stop that bit too well lol its very embarassing. also you really cant just wait to go to the toilet,if you want to go you GOT to go,no choice.
impotence. well, lets just say " fings aint what they used to be " and leave it at that. and yes viagra will help.
swallowing problems. sometimes food,tablets etc.get stuck,the nerves in my throat that control the muscles dont always work properly. speech problems. not bad but i do slur my words if i talk a lot or i am tired. depression. ya think? lol
so sounds horrendous doesnt it?? there i lay, twitching,screaming,peeing, except i am here typing this journal. yes my ankle hurts,yes my legs ache,yes my hands are numb and me bloody back is killing me. but i can walk,ok i do use a walking stick. (jaynee hun if you reading this,can i have ya pink one??? lol) i can care for my mum still,ok sometimes the house doesnt always get hoovered/dusted etc. but who cares? its reasonably clean. i stillcook,just being very careful how i hold hot tins. i still can drive, if i feel very bad,we don't go out in car. common sense. i still do my garden. ON MY GOOD DAYS. and thats the thing. there are days i really cant do anything except feel sorry for myself. so now,i dont. mum understands now better, and we get along from day to day we help each other.
so, anyone who has got MS,or just diagnosed with it,please don't despair. hopefully you will have a long and useful life. just take things easy, and don't do what i did for these past 7 months or so. pretend its not there it is. but it can be tamed. at least i am going to have a damn good try. take care all and thanks for all the comments on my editors choice entry. even if 2 new readers did assume i was female. lol you all help,more than you can realise mort