Friday, 27 June 2008

a friend in need

the above  tag  was  done  by  connie   of  ANYWAY..........................   for  her  friends  who had  helped  her  in her  recent  trouble.  i  asked  if i may  snag  it,  she  gave  me her permission.   so  i  want  you  all to  do  what  she  wants.  pass it  on  to  all your  friends.        please   snag  it  and  use  as  you  will.     if  you  read  this          you  are  my  friend        and  deserve  it.

many thanks  for  those  who answered  my entry  on   Call for Support  a  prayer  for  carrie.   a  good friend , jane,in  my  chatroom i use,  her  daughter  carrie  recently  had  lazer  eye  surgery.  which  seems  to have  gone  tragically  wrong.  poor  girl  is  in a lot  of  pain  and  distress.        neither   write  journals.   yet  when  i  asked        you  replied.   that  is friendship.   thankyou.

mums  visitor  came  yesterday  and  stayed 2  hours,they  have  become  good  friends,   and  has  given  mum   someone  to  talk to.   i am grateful  to  her.   I ,  like many  carers  don't have  much  free time.  if  i am going to be gone out  for any length of time i have toorganise  the  Crossroads  caring  service,    and  they  send  someone  to call in and make  her a  cup of  tea etc.   or  a  neibour  will help.   so, friends  are  important  to  me  and  to  other  carers.   we  need  you.         you  keep  us   sane.   to  be able  to  talk.laugh,  and  to have  someone  you  can  moan  to,when  it gets  bad       that's  friendship.   

i  have  said  some of  this  before.    but  i  realised  just  lately   just  how important  my  "online"  friends   are.    i  don't  have  that  many friends outside  the  web,   pam  is  my  best friend,and  i do go over  to  see her   every  week,   but   i  also  have/ had    a   good  friend       kev,   we  been mates  over 37  years.  i  am  5  years  older  than him,  i  saved  him from  being  bullied  one  day,  just  after  my  dad  died.  the   aspiring  village  bully  was  doing  his  best  to  make  kevs  life  a  misery   when  i  walked  past.   now,bear in mind,  i  was  bullied  a  lot,   and  i mean  a   LOT    at  school.i  was  quiet,   preferred  reading  to  sports,  a  loner.  ( stop saying  awwww pam  lol)  when i left  school i  joined  an electricians  for  6  months  before  deciding  i preferred  shop work,and   was  bullied   by  one  electrician there.    dear  douggy   lol     he  made  my  life  hell.   until  one  day  something  snapped.    he  threw   a  hammer  at  me  and  called  me  ****ing  useless  tosser.        i  broke  his  nose.       hardest  punch  i  ever  threw  in  my  life.  lol         after  that,and  a  lot  of  pain  lol  he  treated  me  with  respect.  which  is  when i  realised.      bullies  are  cowards.   so,   kev  being  bullied,me  going past,   and  1  very  sorry  bully  in a  hawthorn  hedge,    because  i  picked  him up  and  dumped him in  it  lol.   shook  kevs  hand,   and  we  were  mates.   and  were  until  last  year.   he  would  ring  me  every  week,   usually  a  friday,  he  got  free  calls  so  we  would  talk  for  ages.  he  lives  in london,  his  wife  died  several  years  ago.    before  he  moved  away   we  would  go  everywhere  together.    happy  days  kev. i was  due to  go into  hospital last year  for a  tonsil  removed,  i  didnt  know  if  it  was  cancerous,  i  now know  that  it  was  my  MS  causing  many  of the  problems  i was getting,but it was a worrying  time  for  me.    kevin  was  supposed  to ring  the  tuesday  night  after  i got  home.  i  sent  him txt  to say  i was  out  and  op  had  gone  ok,         and  he has  never  rung  me  since.   why?  i  have  no idea.   he  told  mum i was  always on  here,pc,  and  he  never  knew  when  to phone.  now  that  is  true,  but  the last  time  we  talked,the  week  before  the   op  we  were  chatting  for  over  an hour. i  have  sent  txts,  he  replied  to1  saying  would  ring  the  next  week,  never  did.   and  i  just           drifted.   gave  up.          no  christmas  card  from  him,   his  sister  and  mum  sent  us  1             none  from  kev.    no  birthday  card.        so  i  gave  up.         and  then  yesterday  i  opened  our  local  paper           and  in  the  funeral  notices,giving  thanks    was  a notice.   his  mother,Betty  was  dead  and  buried.   said  after  short  illness   at  home,   donations  given  to  macmillan  nurses  so  assume  she  died  from  cancer,       and  neither  he,  nor  his  sister  sue,even  let  me  know  betty  was  dead.         i  used  to  stay  every  weekend,they  kept a pub  and  i would  go  over  on  my  motorbike           another  story  maybe?            and  stay.         betty  was  like  a  second  mother  to  me.    i  would  have  liked  to  have  paid  my  last  respects  at  her  funeral.

so,  apart  from  pam,i  really  don't  have  many  people  (any  really)  i  call  close  friends.apart  from  you all.         my  jland   friends,and   my  chatroom  friends.       and i  thank  you.         for  being  there  when  it  gets  bad          and  say        come  on  mort          another  day  tomorrow.         thankyou.    you  all  deserve  that  award.   every  one  of  you.   take  care  all


cayasm said...

I was bullied at school so i know how that feels, now I just wouldn't stand for it, and always stick up for others if I can. As for Kev he's let too much time pass now and he's probably embarassed, give him a call i'm sure he'd appreciate hearing from you, but i hear what your saying. My online friendships are important to me amazing the blogging world, it's opened up new doors for me, and everyone is just a click away. your a good friend too Mort and it's much appreciated.
Regards to Mum

Take care


dsonney01 said...

Connections with people are as important as eating. They nourish the inner person. Glad your mum has a friend to visit- make use of the time for you. We all are friends here! Dannelle

jjdolfin9 said...

I'm sorry about Kev.  I, like you, have very few friends outside of this box we call a computer.  When I retired 3 years ago and the friends that I had from work continued working, it's like they just forgot me.  They are all over an hour away but...anyway.  I said all that to say I understand how you feel.  If it weren't for my friends on the puter I would be lost.  Thanks for being among them.
Hugs, Joyce

lanurseprn said...

I'm sorry about Kev. He should have let you know about his Mum. I am afraid that is what will happen with Joey...that his Mom will die and I won't be notified. She was like my #2 Mom. I know what you mean.
You are a great friend Mort. I wish I could meet you in person. I have a feeling we'd be great pals! Then, you'd have TWO Pams!! How lucky can a guy get?? <kidding> LOL!
Hope you have a great weekend.
Love ya MUCH, Pam xoxox

jeanno43 said...

What a lovely thing to do Mort, making that award and presenting it to you.  I would like to have it myself but not sure if I am considered a supportive friend
I am so sorry your friend has treated you like that, there is no accounting for people.  I have had it happen with my brother and we only live one hundred yards apart.  When I was diagnosed Mike told him.  Not one phone call, no card, nothing. I consider I have no brother now.  But you are right, we have many friends here online.  Take care my friend and have a good weekend.

ukgal36 said...


mjgm1954 said...

hey Mort. i missed the call for support! so sorry. i am not savy of all the sites. never been to that one. if you ever need my humble prayers in anyone behalf please just write em. it is a briviledge and an honor  to pray for another.
thank you for saying thank you! lol you mean the same to me. we are quite blessed to have each other . out of all the billions in the world i feel God led us to each other in jland.  i dont even want to think about what my life was like before jack and Lucy and the rest of you.
Mort i must be slipping. ! iwas so confused by dr. who. watched it twice, then watched it with my son . we discussed it but i am still confused. i say he saved her in virtual life. my son thought she was back alive with her mates at the end. we both wonder if they were married because he said only one reason form her to know his true name!!!
my son said that those were their  children she was reading to in the end   HELP!!! i am so confused,  lol

jhorky said...

Mort, I try  not to bug you but I think of you often throughout the day.  I consider you a true friend.  I hope you feel the same.  I get down at times but I think of you and my son and all the people in this world that have every right to be down, and I feel ashamed.  I do get angry with myself for being TO sensetive.  Tell your mum hi for me.  Lucy

funnyface0s0 said...

Hello Mort ....
Gosh that was a heartfelt entry today - its a shame Kevin has lost touch with you, but perhaps he didn't mean to.....extend your hand to him now, you never know it might be just what he needs, remember you were once very supportive of him.
Life brings all kinds of situations into our lives and all kinds of people with it, some jus remain acquaintences and others dearly loved friends, they all add something to our lives for a reason, and it is up to us to determine what reason and how we use it.
You're a lovley chap Mort and a nice friend :o)
Big Luv - Jaynee X

jmoqueen said...

I have to admit I was doing a pam and going awwwwwwww.............I agree that most of my friends are online ones apart from Trina of course lol......but you kind of know where you are with an online friend :o)


pamal3 said...

Hey my fav other man. I need you to know something... You sitting comfortably?...Listening?.... Ok ok keep your hair on I will tell you now! lol. speaking on behalf of all of us J-Landers, we all totally love you to bits and need you to realise how much you enrich our lives. I know that I personally would be lost without your friendship. It is sad when people, especially close friends drift apart the way yours did. I found myself In that exact same situation as you a few years back and It almost broke my heart. If I had to give any advice, It would be to try one more time sending a text to kev with a make or break ultimatum. If you get no response. that's It. It's gone, In the past, you have to wish It well and let It go. Life can be so cruel sometimes. On a cheerier note tho...I would have paid good money to see you whacking that clown! lol.Crossroads Is good from what I hear, I am heading towards that line of work. That's what I want to do. I am so pleased your mum has got a friend. Stay strong my lamb. Apologies for the novel!! lol I will send you an Invoice! ;-) Love Pam xx

rdautumnsage said...

I'm the one sitting her saying Awww Mort. I hope you know without a doubt I'll always be here for you hon. Feel free to email me anytime you need to talk or have someone listen. It takes a lot of courage to learn to stand up for yourself. I'm sorry Kev has fallen out with you. No matter what they should of still extended the courtesy to let you know what happened to his mother. Your in my thoughts dear friend. (Hugs)Indigo

catslittertray said...

now then young man,
we all love you to bits and would be lost without out you,
i know how i felt over the last 7 days whilst unable to chat etc,
.....more on my blog later hopefully...
(((((((((((((((((((((((((BIG HUG)))))))))))))))))))))))))